A short time back, my three sisters and I spent an evening together via Zoom. One of them kicked off the conversation by asking, “How’s everybody doing?” “I’m fine!” I answered immediately. Funny how, when the question was posed, we all seemed quick to default to that pat answer. Even so, none of our responses sounded very convincing. Compared to many others, I am truly fine. I have no serious health concerns. I have a comfortable home, plenty to eat,…
It was a sacred day. The minister had said it was, and to all of us gathered at my father’s graveside, it truly felt that way. On that beautiful, sunshiny spring morning, my siblings and our spouses had met outside the funeral home. From there we would accompany Dad’s body on its final journey. The official funeral home car with its yellow flashing lights led the way, and the hearse followed. The rest of us fell in behind for the…
In our family it’s a well-known fact: I like to talk. I can talk with almost anyone—and I do. Once I get past my initial shyness, I start chatting. Before you know it, I’ve fallen effortlessly into yet another long and meandering conversation. Although I enjoy conversing and getting to know people better, I admit my chattiness could benefit from a little discipline. Practicing mindful speech might be the best way to make that happen. There is incredible power in…
It began as a pleasant evening at home. But with one act of tenderness it quickly became a cloud nine kind of night. On a recent Saturday, my husband and I were relaxing at home, hanging out with the dog and watching television. When my phone rang, I realized it was a FaceTime call from my son. “What?!?! Why does it always happen that he decides to FaceTime when I’m looking my worst?” That was my first thought. …
One of my favorite writers these days is Gregory Boyle, author of Tattoos on the Heart and Barking to the Choir. A Jesuit priest and founder of Homeboy Industries, he writes of his experiences working with gangs in Los Angeles. The thing is, although the books are not really that long, they take me forever to finish. I tend to read a little, cry a little, sometimes laugh a bit, and then reread sections multiple times. I’m amazed by his…
Every December 31 for as long as I can remember, I’ve made New Year’s resolutions. And for as long as I can remember, those resolutions—often the same ones year after year—quickly fell by the wayside. Each time I failed to follow through, I ended up feeling disappointed. I berated myself for my lack of discipline and added a layer or two of guilt I felt I deserved. Several years ago I transitioned from the impossible resolution lists to creating vision boards. I…
In celebration of a milestone birthday this week, I’ve spent a little time reflecting on the experiences I’ve had throughout my life. What stands out most in my mind is how much I’ve evolved from the incredibly shy little girl who began this journey. This became more apparent following a recent experience on the road. My 91-year-old father has dementia. Although he thinks he never has visitors, my siblings and I take turns visiting him every weekend. A couple weekends…
Wisdom—I like to believe I’ve gained a lot of it over the course of my life. I can certainly talk the talk, confident about how I should respond to the challenges I’m bound to face from time to time. “Remember to stay in the moment.” “Focus on breathing deeply.” “Say a prayer and then release it to God.” “Relax!” “Don’t waste your energy on worrying.” “Just walk through the experience.” Oh yes, I know all the right things to tell…
Several years ago I heard a song by the Avett Brothers, and I loved it—the message, the melody, and especially the cello. That instrument just speaks to my soul! Recently I started listening to more of their music, and my admiration for their talent continues to grow. I realize I’m a latecomer to jump on the band’s fan wagon, but I’m here now. And I am all in! I have particularly fallen in love with their song “No Hard Feelings.” I…
Until a few years ago, I knew little about the practice of mindfulness, the conscious effort to live in the present moment. As I began to study and practice it, I began to recognize many benefits it offers. I sensed a stronger layer of contentment developing within myself. BY NANCY KIDD I now realize I have wasted a great deal of energy worrying about the future and replaying past events unceasingly. Because of this, I am quite certain I have…