Every December 31 for as long as I can remember, I’ve made New Year’s resolutions. And for as long as I can remember, those resolutions—often the same ones year after year—quickly fell by the wayside.

Each time I failed to follow through, I ended up feeling disappointed. I berated myself for my lack of discipline and added a layer or two of guilt I felt I deserved.

Several years ago I transitioned from the impossible resolution lists to creating vision boards. I tried putting together posters of all my “dreams” for the new year. I chose pictures and words to represent all the new things I wanted to do. I included new things to learn and ways I wanted to improve. Although it was a fun activity on New Year’s Eve with family members, the results were always the same as those annual resolutions.

I seemed to strike out time after time.

Time to change

Last year, however, things were different. A couple weeks into the new year I attended a workshop that set the tone for a healthier perspective. After settling ourselves with some mindful breathing, we spent some time reflecting on the good things of the past year. We wrote down some of the highlights, and we offered thanks for those happenings.

Then we turned our attention to the not-so-good things—things from the previous year we wanted to let go of. As we had done with the positives, we listed the negatives on slips of paper. The person presenting the workshop collected all the papers and promised to ceremoniously burn them the next day.

I thought I understood the significance of burning the negatives. I could see that burning them would help us feel we had removed them from our lives. Feeling renewed, we could now make room for more beneficial feelings and experiences.

But why was she going to burn the positives? I think to remind us not to dwell on the past but rather focus on the present. Maybe we can hold onto the memory of the goodness we’ve experienced as long as we don’t camp out there. If we do, we risk missing out on the richness of experiences of the present.

At the workshop we continued with more mindful breathing and meditation. Then we moved on to create vision boards. At that point, I began to feel skeptical. I remember thinking it might be another fun little art project. But, based on my previous experiences, I doubted its usefulness.

Skip the trash bin

The truth is, I’d never actually completed a vision board before. I would work on it on New Year’s Eve, and then I’d set it aside. Days later I would find it again, and eventually I would toss it in the trash. 

For some reason, I was more committed last January. Although I didn’t finish my vision board on the day of the workshop, I took it home. I continued to work on it the next day and the next. I kept adding to it until I liked the way it looked and what it represented. I hung it next to my desk where I’ve glanced at it often.

And I’ve noticed something pretty amazing! Every single thing on that vision board has begun to unfold in my life. I don’t know how or why, but it represents the path my life has taken this last year! I haven’t arrived, of course, but I am on the journey of my desires, and it feels awesome!

This time, for once, there is no judgment or guilt—just a whole lot of appreciation.

Last January I pasted onto my vision board words I’d cut from a magazine “Blog-blogger-blogging.” There were lots of hearts sprinkled around the images of nature and diverse groups of people I’d included. I noted my strong beliefs in our oneness and in seeing and loving one another. And there were phrases about doing things with passion and being creative. 

Which takes me now to this year. What am I going to do?

And this year?

I’m going to start with personal quiet time—a chance to look back and reflect on the things that have served me well and also the negatives I need to release. I plan to write them down and to give thanks for every single one of them. Then I’ll offer them up in a ceremonial burning of my own.

And though I’m not certain I’ll create a new vision board because I still love last year’s model, I am sure of the one thing I plan to focus on for 2019.

For me, next year is all about living a life of joy—joy born of and sustained by mindfulness and gratitude.

I believe it’s already there, just waiting to be recognized!

A colorful magnet on my fridge reminds me: “If I’m not happy in this time, in this place, I’m not paying attention.”