One of my beloved sisters just celebrated a special birthday.

Approaching a milestone five years ago, she’d made big plans to spend it with her husband and children. When Mom passed away suddenly just a couple weeks before the anticipated celebration, all thoughts of party plans fell by the wayside. The focus shifted to grieving and caring for our father.

A quick five years later found this same sister at the door of another significant birthday. Again, she’d hoped to celebrate with family, and again, her plans were thwarted. This time COVID-19 stood in the way.  

My two other sisters and I wanted to make her day special, but what could we do with many miles and a pandemic separating us? We tossed around a few ideas, but nothing stuck.

Then a friend suggested to me that we put together a tribute video with friends and family. I shared the idea with my two sisters, and they thought it was a great idea.

There were, however, a couple major concerns:

1—I didn’t get the idea until a week before the birthday. That hardly seemed like enough time to put get the word out, get responses back, and get something put together.

2—Who was going to take actually take the lead on this? The other two sisters have very busy lives. They’re trying to navigate life during a pandemic. They’re doing it while working fulltime jobs and tending to their families, including one special needs child.

(Gulp!) 

I soon realized I was the obvious choice to take on the project. “But-but-but…,” I longed to protest. “I have no skills in that area. I’m technologically challenged, and I’m not too proud to admit it. Plus, there’s no time to spare.”

Believe me, if we’d had ANY other ideas, I would have voted for them. Since we didn’t, I reluctantly decided to accept the challenge before me.

What I re-discovered is that taking a deep breath followed by one little step is a remarkable way to begin any journey into the frightening unknown. I tried not to worry about the quick turnaround time. I just dealt with each component/issue as it arose.

(Breathe)

Registering with the website was my jumping off place. With that commitment, I knew there’d be no turning back. 

(Breathe)

With the help of my niece and good old Facebook, I was able to locate some of my sister’s friends and gather their contact info.

(Breathe)

I sent e-vites to family members and my sister’s friends, asking them to contribute video clips. The invitation included a couple prompts encouraging them to let her know what they most valued about her. Hitting the “send” button to all those people further cemented my commitment to the project.

What was I getting myself into?

(Breathe)

Gathering photos of my sister was next on my agenda. I wanted to start with pictures from her early years and move on to the present. The problem was most of those photos were in her possession. Thank goodness for the help of her family and one of my sisters. 

It was time to make our own contributions. My husband recorded his personal video, and then I made my own.  

By that point I was beginning to feel a little more comfortable. I decided to up my game and include my beagle Tulip in the tribute. I downloaded a talking pet app and recorded Tulip offering her heartfelt sentiments. It was yet another new skill the project taught me—not a necessarily useful one, but fun nonetheless.

All of a sudden the people started responding. Some videos went directly to the website. Others came to me via text, email, and sometimes Messenger

(Breathe)

Things were starting to get scary. I was downloading, and I was uploading, and sometimes the materials didn’t end up where I needed them to be.

(Breathe—breathe—breathe)

All I can say is, “Thank goodness for Google and for the website’s chat assistance!”

(Breathe)

Before I knew it, it was time to put it all together. I organized photos and videos in the order they would appear. I selected the transition special effects between each submission. I chose the music to accompany the video.

(Breathe)

Burning the midnight oil on the night before it was due, I submitted the final product to be published.  

As soon as I’d sent it, worry began to seep in. I didn’t expect perfection, but had I looked it over carefully? Would it be good enough?

The next day I texted my sister and told her to check her email. The birthday tribute video was released in an email to her at the same time it went out to all the invitees. 

Moments later she texted back that she was blubbering at her computer. A while later she sent me a thank you email. Knowing me as she does, she acknowledged that technology stuff is really not in my wheelhouse. She said that made it an even greater gift.

And later yet, she told us all that she felt so very loved and honored. Yes, I think the video had done all we’d hoped it might do.

(Breathe)

This last deep breath was one of relief.

Little did I know that, when we decided to offer this tribute as a gift to our sister, I would also receive some gifts.  

Throughout the project and even afterwards, I was gifted a deep sense of gratitude. I appreciated all the contributions I’d received from people throughout the country. As I compiled all the tender messages, I found myself wiping away tears, thrilled to be offering a conduit for these stories and emotions. I was grateful to offer such a gift of collective love to our sister.  

In addition to the gratitude, I was also presented the gift of gratification.

It appeared when I stepped out of my comfort zone and leaned into uncertainty. It showed up in a few gained tech skills. And it emerged when I recognized the lightness, the renewed energy, and the joy I was experiencing. With that sense of fulfillment came the realization once again I that I feel most alive when I choose to grow through discomfort.