Opposite? Unlovable? Love them anyway

Opposite? Unlovable? Love them anyway

Photo by Duncan Sanchez on Unsplash

When we moved to the new detention facility in 2000, our school program received a huge boost in resources. It was exciting because, so opposite from previously, we had complete sets of classroom textbooks.

Our wonderful new literature books catered to a wide range of reading abilities. Included in the drama unit was a favorite of mine, an excerpt of Lorraine Hansberry’s play, A Raisin in the Sun.

Every year we read that act of the play, and afterwards, we watched the movie starring Sidney Poitier. Watching a black and white movie seemed excruciatingly painful to some of the students. I found their response amusing and kidded that it was all part of our great plan to inflict more torture on them! But in reality, I preferred the 1961 version of the film to the 2008 updated one. Plus, I also wanted the students to learn there are some truly amazing black and white movies.

With each class, I tried to make a point of stopping the film right after “Mama” delivered a fiery speech to her daughter “Beneatha.”

“There is always something left to love. And if you ain’t learned that, you ain’t learned nothing . … When do you think is the time to love somebody the most? When they done good and made things easy for everybody? Well then, you ain’t through learning because that ain’t the time at all. It’s when he’s at his lowest and can’t believe in hisself ‘cause the world done whipped him so! When you starts measuring somebody, measure him right, child, measure him right. Make sure you done taken into account what hills and valleys he come through before he got to wherever he is.”

I would always stop the movie at that same point and replay that clip. I didn’t preach, and we didn’t discuss it.

The message of Mama’s speech was so impactful, and I wanted to be sure the students didn’t miss it. I hoped they would see themselves and realize they always had something lovable left inside. No matter what they’d done or how many times they’d been in trouble, they still needed to know they had value and deserved to be loved.

I also hoped they would remember the message when thinking of others. We are often quick to discount and discard people we don’t get along with. We appear to find it easy to ignore people we don’t know or aren’t close to—as if they simply don’t matter.

Every one of us deserves to feel valued, but every one of us also needs to acknowledge the inherent worth of every other human being.

Divisiveness abounds in our world today. We form our opinions and dig in our heels, refusing to consider any other perspective. Often we seem to love only those who think as we do. And as tensions mount and the vitriol festers, outright hatred may begin to appear. If we allow it to grow unchecked as a cancer, we risk being consumed by its vile ugliness.

When we start to disregard the worth of other people, we are in danger of losing our own humanity.

I believe our very survival depends on how we handle our interdependence. We need each other, and we are meant to be together, to support and encourage one another—always.  

The story of Patton Oswalt last week on my Facebook page exemplifies something we can all work on.

When in a Twitter battle with a stranger over differing political views, he decided to step back for a second look. When he learned a little more about his adversary, he realized the other person was facing serious problems. At that point, Oswalt dropped his need to be right and instead reached out to offer his help. Both men seemed to have come away with changed hearts.

May we all grow from that example and learn to expand our own hearts in a similar fashion. May we be willing to put our own opinions on hold long enough to truly see the other person as one with worth equal to our own. 

May we learn to step up eagerly to do our part to uplift those who’ve been driven to their lowest. May we offer hope to the hopeless. May we reach out in love to all souls in desperate need of being loved.

It takes minimal effort to love those who are just like us. It’s especially easy when we they, according to our standards,  “done good and made things easy for everybody.” 

But we need to dig deeper and find a way to love those who are more like our opposites. Although it’s likely to be more difficult and require more risk, the results stand to be more remarkable. 

For when we get outside our own comfort zones and reach out to engage with those we perceive as different, we may ultimately elevate all our spirits.

3 thoughts on “Opposite? Unlovable? Love them anyway

  1. That part that you always played but didn’t discuss in so true. I loved that. I need to do that more, as well!

Comments are closed.

Comments are closed.